I can’t help but wonder what things will be like for me, my three kids and three step-kids, our eleven grandkids and three great-grandkids (and I am only 55!), and all the ones to follow. I am active, informed and engaged with family, friends, business associates and our society. I am not alone. There are many more like me; in fact, about 77 million of us Baby Boomers. Most of us work, vote, have families and we watch out for our kids and parents.

As a Gerontologist, a social scientist who studies research, trends and successful aging specific to ages 60 and above, I spend a lot of time evaluating older age groups and the products and services they typically require and use. Healthcare reform will affect every age group, and many Americans are unaware—or just very trusting—of how this will work out specifically for them. Since the mathematics of taxpayer cost for government-run healthcare is massive and unrealized, America is not yet ready for the upheaval over “all ages-related” services and care options its people are about to enter into.

So it’s time to have a discussion about age and ageism. Ageism is one of the prejudices that—much like racism, genderism or religious hatred—spurs some who are not older to behave badly toward those who are older, whether it’s thinly masked or blatantly evident. It is time to call ageism out into the open, and name it for what it is: just another form of prejudice. In fact, names are what prejudice usually can be recognized by.

First, let’s agree that “a rose by any other name is still a rose”, and conversely, a stinker is always a stinker. In preparing to write this article, I researched this topic with my 23-year old daughter and some of her friends. I asked them for names that they have used or heard old people called by. Some funny and a few irreverent terms came out.

They started with the respectful senior citizens and retirees, moved to mature individuals and had no problem with the generic, the old. Not all that problematic. I threw down the gauntlet that I wanted reality, and we agreed that mature adults, although accurate, just sounded a little triple-X. We then got to geezers, blue hairs and old farts, which are okay only when that age group uses those monikers (sound familiar?). We laughed when they admitted to using old asses or grandmas when anyone drives too slowly in front of them; which, they pointed out, is unfair to their own “rockin’ grandmas”, whom they really love. We all had to agree with the newest and most accurate term for seniors: older adults.

This exercise proves that most Americans can come to terms with ageism and dispel it, although there will always be the jerks and the immature. In examining the terms we choose to describe what ALL of us are destined to become—old—the positive naming of older people can be a genuine effort NOT to marginalize their accomplishments and their ongoing contributions to society. Maybe, this time, we can get it right!

© 2010 Diane Alexander Patterson, MSG, CPG “If good real estate is about location, location, location, then ‘success in aging’ is about attitude, attitude, attitude!” www.SeasonofLife.net

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• Tips on Caring for the Elderly: Elderspeak

Whether you are caring for aging parents or new to the aging marketplace, here are a few of my Successful Strategies in Elderspeak. These recommendations have their foundations in biology of Aging and psychology of Aging coursework and in my many years of experience with older adults.

Slow down.

Think quickly, but speak slowly. Response time, both physically and mentally, is a little slower for elderly, but not necessarily of lesser quality. That is also important to remember when deciding how to approach your family members/clients: they have “been around the block” more often than their younger counterparts, so don’t assume they can’t keep up with you when you are explaining your policies and procedures.

Say what you mean.

Your older adult might not have understood what you meant.  Since the elderly come from a different generation than most of us do, their “dictionary” could be a little different than yours, in the sense of how you are phrasing things. Terms and technology change quickly these days. Ask your family member/client if you are making sense to her/him, and if need be, re-phrase until she/he clearly understands you.

Ask the elder to repeat it.

Always a great idea in any communication exercise, but especially helpful with the elderly.  You will get a first hand lesson in what your family member/client has translated your message into.  Also, being from a very respect-oriented generation, he/she might not have assertively communicated his/her preferences to you.   Their respect for your family/professional status might put them off from pressing harder.

Remember that the issues of respect, losses, and wisdom are important.

Aging brings along with it a desire to complete one’s lifework.  Youth has fallen away, careers have receded, and children have universes of their own.  Life becomes quieter.  Offer work that takes into account those parameters, realize that respect is the greater part of their dignity, and give consideration to the chronic losses of old age. Be honoring.

Di Patterson, MSG, CPG

© 2010 Diane Alexander Patterson, MSG, CPG “If good real estate is about location, location, location, then ‘success in aging’ is about attitude, attitude, attitude!” www.SeasonofLife.net

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• Age and Ageism

Di Patterson:
Expedia.com and Priceline.com are great sites to search for cheap plane tickets. But don’t forget about car/train trips…

And if you want to try other traveling options, the train is a great way to travel. It may take longer than a plane ride but it’s usually cheaper and less stressful. Plus you get to watch the scenery. Beautiful. And if you fly, avoid connecting flights through coastal cities. I just had the worst layover in San Francisco due to fog!

If you are an Auto Club (AAA) member, call them before your next trip and see what other services they have for you.  They provide many discounts across the country that you are probably not taking advantage of. Visit site

Check it out, and happy traveling!

Be sure to read my Travel Guide

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• Travel Guide
• Are cruises good for a family trip?
• What about educational vacations?

Here are some great tips to start you on the road to organizing success:

1. Set a budget for the most that you want to spend right now on supplies, and plan to stick to it. “Necessity is the mother of invention” when it comes to making resources stretch in a slow economy, and you might be surprised by the good deals that are waiting to be found. Remember to budget enough time, too, and budget a reward for yourself and your team when the job is done!
2. Chose your goals: If the job looks bigger than your budget, scale down and plan to do more when you can afford it. Enlist the help of older family members or friends who have tackled organizing before. You will appreciate their wisdom!
3. Establish your personal parameters: Be honest about what you are willing to do to accomplish your goals. Finish these sentences: “I can…; I cannot…; I will…; I will not…” Use the verbs “lift” and “toss” to start your organizing ideas flowing!
4. Search websites for the organizing items you need before you spend any money. Check to see if websites give any discounts, coupons, or offer free shipping. Go to “brick and mortar” stores only after finding their online or newspaper ads and getting the best prices available. The truth is, when you have put in a lot of effort to spend wisely and work to complete the task you set out to accomplish, your satisfaction level will be very rewarding and the pride of ownership in your job-well-done will compel you to keep organized!
5. Remember to fill your space with beauty when you are finished!
6. If you are giving the gift of organizing for an older loved one, you are helping them immensely. Getting an elder organized is a viable way to help keep the Greatest Generation and Boomer Generation aging well at home; free of clutter, safely and organized. Although anyone with a good understanding of their senior’s needs and preferences can assist with cleaning-up and clutter removal, many times a neutral third party is “just the ticket” to avoid family stress and squabbles. Hire a professional organizer at www.napo.net if it overwhelms you on your own.

You may not have heard of at all — or you may be well-acquainted with professional organizers. NAPO, the National Association of Professional Organizers, is an organization that boasts many members, both nationally and internationally. NAPO’s mission is to develop, lead, and promote professional organizers and the organizing industry. NAPO credentials, that is, requires its members to meet ethical and educational standards that the public can count on when seeking to hire a reputable person.

Professional organizers (PO’s) help seniors and their families adjust to their changing housing needs. PO’s believe that they will better serve their clients if seniors are on-track with the natural evolution of their lifestyles, and can create some breathing room for them to enjoy as they “age in place.” Senior-specific organizing has the potential to bring a new dimension of positive social impact to seniors and good business opportunities designed to serve the elderly.

…and remember, wisdom comes with age, so be AgeWise!

Random Posts

• Age and Ageism
• How can I protect my credit?
• Are cruises good for a family trip?

Di Patterson:
I’m so glad to hear that you’re being proactive about this, because that’s the best way to fortify your credit and ensure you’ll be able to withstand difficult economic conditions. There are a few things you can do right now to protect your credit.

1. Check your own FICO score with the “Big 3″ credit bureaus: Experian, Equifax, and TransUnion
   If there are blemishes, contact the company in writing and tell them you’d like to resolve the matter (if possible). Be sure to make a copy of the letter you send and send it directly to the credit reporting bureaus.
2. If there are extenuating circumstances that affected your credit — such as a medical situation — write a description of the circumstance and send it to the credit reporting bureas.
3. Protect yourself against identity theft. There are a few services that can proactively stop ID theft before it happens, such as LifeLock

…here are a few other great resources:

The Federal Trade Commission
Consumer Credit Protection information: http://www.ftc.gov/index.shtml

Hope Alliance
A federally-funded Housing Information Service (Counsel at No Charge!)
888-305-2262

… and the “Big 3″ credit bureaus are:

	Equifax P.O. Box 740256 Atlanta, GA 30374 (800)-685-1111 Web site: www.equifax.com
	Experian PO Box 2002 Allen, TX 75013 (888) 397-3742 Web site: www.experian.com
	TransUnion LLC P.O. Box 2000 Chester, PA 19022 (800) 888-4213 Web site: www.transunion.com

Don’t forget to read my Financial Resource Guide

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• How can I save my house from foreclosure?
• Financial Resource Guide
• Any suggestions for a mini vacation?

“Looking forward” is one of the most positive practices in your quest for success in aging.  My maternal Grandfather, who had been executive vice-president of a very large life insurance company, told me the secret to his aging success. After 20 years of retirement, with another decade left to live, he said, “Di, I always make a list before I go to bed at night of at least three things that I want to get done tomorrow. If I have something to look forward to, I know I’ll wake up.” My Granddad lived past his 95th birthday!

So decide what you want to look forward to and start making the plan. Saving for a long-awaited vacation gives a sense of purpose to the exercise. Foregoing small extras now as we save for that trip increases the value of our vacation. Researching our destinations and the local restaurants, shopping and daytrips gives us something to do while we are foregoing those small extras. Just like planning a spring garden when sitting at home in a snowstorm, searching websites and collecting catalogs will help you plan a really great vacation, pass the time and give you options as you  look forward to future fun!

Another insight to remember as you continue working, saving and planning is the emotional, mental and physical positive side-effects of a vacation.  The word “recreation” is really “re-creation”.  By taking time off the daily grind of our lives, we are re-creating our psyche by relaxing our physical self. Much like an engine that needs a regular tune-up, we actually need to “blow out the pipes” of our internal structure: our minds need a rest; our hearts need to find joy and relief. Our eyes need new vistas; our ears need different music. Surprise and delight must refresh our weary emotions.

Many times, this requires a total “de-teching”. The electronic devices that keep us running during our working weeks can also “run us into the ground” with emotional stress. More families are declaring “e-free zones” during family times and vacations these days. So if you must take your laptop along, bring a paper-version book (no booting-up required!) you have been looking forward to reading and give your mind a vacation, too.  We all need “down time” in order to be our best for the rest of our work year.

You might try a new physical sport: snorkeling with the sea turtles in Hawaii, parasailing behind a speedboat in the Pacific, bungee-jumping off a cliff or bridge, learning to scuba dive somewhere you’ve never been, getting a golf lesson or two from a pro at an historic golf club, taking an ice-skating lesson or learning archery at an Olympic training facility, group hiking in the mountains or solitary bike riding along a beach.

There are plenty of cost-effective ways to prepare to enjoy these experiences while you are still at home. Your local city parks and recreation departments offer both sports and educational types of classes several times a year at nominal cost. Most counties provide travelogue videos at public libraries. State-funded community colleges and universities offer free computer rooms and libraries to do your research in.  Here’s a list of some great options for travel with a few of my recommendations:

Cruises

1. Family Travel: Cruising is just a great way to travel for families!  The all-inclusive prices are great for budgeting, because most of the costs are covered up front. Souvenirs and adult drinks are the exceptions, as soft-drink packages can even be purchased prior to or during the cruise. There are child and teen programs that allow parents to have “just us” time. Lots of family activities— like rock-climbing, pool parties, golf driving range off the back of the ship, board game contests, video games, and family movies and live shows—are offered throughout the day and evening. Depending on the ports, daytrips can be pre-planned and paid in the cruise package. Even special occasion packages for birthdays, wedding anniversaries and other celebrations can be pre-planned and pre-paid. Most information can be obtained on the cruise liner’s website, and calling the customer service department with your list of questions can fill-in the details. Giving the younger people in your family the special adventure of “sailing the ocean blue” is a vacation they will never forget!
2. Reunions and Special Events at Sea: More and more organizations are utilizing cruises as the preferred site of conferences, reunions, and educational experiences. Let’s face it, both the planning committee and the attendees look forward to such a fun and easy solution to mixing business and pleasure! As noted above, cruising is budget-friendly,
3. Extended Cruising for Seniors
4. Find great cruise packages at CruiseDirect.com

Bed and Breakfasts
The easiest way to find B&B’s in at BedandBreakfast.com and check out my tips here: http://www.agewise.tv/?p=204

Planes, Trains, and Triple A?

1. Expedia.com vs. Priceline.com: Helpful Hints to use both to your advantage
2. Amtrak as an option: Leisurely Travel through America
3. Auto Club (AAA.COM) services to members: more than just maps!

Destination Vacations: Golf Resorts

1. Callaway Fitting Factory, La Costa CA
2. Golf Hall of Fame, St. Augustine, FL
3. Golf Museum, Scottsdale, AZ

(Read my tips on Golf equipment here: http://www.agewise.tv/?p=209)

Vacations with all the comforts of home: Stay home, See Local Sights and Eat Out!

1. Entertainment Books: Local Restaurant and Travel Coupons
2. Online Video Nights: Best YouTube Finds and Pizza Night
3. Computer-to-Television Cable and www.hulu.com: It really is incredible how much we can find on the computer these days. I have friends who watch all their regular TV shows but they don’t even have a TV! They watch everything they want to watch online. Or, if you have a TV but no cable, then you can buy a Computer-to-Television cable so you can watch on your TV what is playing on your computer. (Note: discount computer-to-TV cables are available at BetterCables.com!)

Non-Traditional Vacations: the New Alternatives

1. ElderHostel.org, for life-long learning and adventure
2. House Trading, as featured in the movie The Holiday which shows how a couple used HomeExchange.com to trade houses and rekindle their relationship (its a cute picture!)
3. CouchSurfing.com — Come on… you’ve gotta love the name!
   

ducation-based Vacations

1. Enroll in Community College!  Amazing travel deals for Students
2. Elder Hostel; AARP Packages — Visit site
3. Vacations with Purpose: Volunteering in Foreign Climes

Helpful Products
Wraparound Sunglasses, Comfortable Walking Shoes, Lightweight and Easy Packing Clothes, Luggage: wheeled luggage a must! (Guard your backs, necks and knees!), Vitamins and Supplements, RXs and sunscreen; and always take a bathing suit! Rubber-soled sandals for the shower and the beach, Family photo in a lightweight frame, a few travel-worthy snacks: unsalted nuts (travel usually makes us swell, so no salt!), crackers, dried fruit…

…the things that you would need if:

1. you get stuck in an airport and you have to stay near the gate for an extended time
2. you get an upset stomach and need to calm it down
3. your travel plans get “readjusted” and you have to “stave off starvation”
4. you feel like staying in your stateroom while you get your “sea legs”
5. or you want to go “adventuring” and need some trail mix!

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• Planes, trains and triple A?
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Question:

Di Patterson:
Cruising is just a great way to travel for families! The all-inclusive prices are great for budgeting, because most of the costs are covered up front. Souvenirs and adult drinks are the exceptions, as soft-drink packages can even be purchased prior to or during the cruise. There are child and teen programs that allow parents to have “just us” time. Lots of family activities— like rock-climbing, pool parties, golf driving range off the back of the ship, board game contests, video games, and family movies and live shows—are offered throughout the day and evening. Depending on the ports, daytrips can be pre-planned and paid in the cruise package. Even special occasion packages for birthdays, wedding anniversaries and other celebrations can be pre-planned and pre-paid. Most information can be obtained on the cruise liner’s website, and calling the customer service department with your list of questions can fill-in the details. Giving the younger people in your family the special adventure of “sailing the ocean blue” is a vacation they will never forget!

Here are a couple other great cruising ideas:

1. Reunions and Special Events at Sea: More and more organizations are utilizing cruises as the preferred site of conferences, reunions, and educational experiences. Let’s face it, both the planning committee and the attendees look forward to such a fun and easy solution to mixing business and pleasure! As noted above, cruising is budget-friendly.
2. Extended Cruising for Seniors

Helpful Products
Wraparound Sunglasses, Comfortable Walking Shoes, Lightweight and Easy Packing Clothes, Luggage: wheeled luggage a must! (Guard your backs, necks and knees!), Vitamins and Supplements, RXs and sunscreen; and always take a bathing suit! Rubber-soled sandals for the shower and the beach, Family photo in a lightweight frame, a few travel-worthy snacks: unsalted nuts (travel usually makes us swell, so no salt!), crackers, dried fruit…

…the things that you would need if:

1. You get stuck in an airport and you have to stay near the gate for an extended time
2. You get an upset stomach and need to calm it down
3. Your travel plans get “readjusted” and you have to “stave off starvation”
4. You feel like staying in your stateroom while you get your “sea legs”
5. You want to go “adventuring” and need some trail mix!

Be sure to read my Travel Guide

...you may also be interested in:

• Travel Guide
• Any suggestions for a mini vacation?
• Do you recommend Bed & Breakfasts?

Question:

Di Patterson:
I’m happy to say that there is a way to do that. Here are a couple options below:

1. Enroll in Community College!  Amazing travel deals for Students
2. Elder Hostel; AARP Packages — Visit site
3. Vacations with Purpose: Volunteering in Foreign Climes

Helpful Products
Wraparound Sunglasses, Comfortable Walking Shoes, Lightweight and Easy Packing Clothes, Luggage: wheeled luggage a must! (Guard your backs, necks and knees!), Vitamins and Supplements, RXs and sunscreen; and always take a bathing suit! Rubber-soled sandals for the shower and the beach, Family photo in a lightweight frame, a few travel-worthy snacks: unsalted nuts (travel usually makes us swell, so no salt!), crackers, dried fruit…

…the things that you would need if:

1. you get stuck in an airport and you have to stay near the gate for an extended time
2. you get an upset stomach and need to calm it down
3. your travel plans get “readjusted” and you have to “stave off starvation”
4. you feel like staying in your stateroom while you get your “sea legs”
5. or you want to go “adventuring” and need some trail mix!

Be sure to read my Travel Guide

...you may also be interested in:

• Planes, trains and triple A?
• Travel Guide
• Are cruises good for a family trip?

Di Patterson:
You are not the first person to ask me this question. These are tough times financially for all of us and I commend you for wanting to watch your pocket-book, and also setting aside quality time with your family!

Here are some ideas for some vacations with all the comforts of home:

1. Entertainment Books: Local Restaurant and Travel Coupons
2. Online Video Nights: Best YouTube Finds and Pizza Night
3. Computer-to-Television Cable and www.hulu.com: It really is incredible how much we can find on the computer these days. I have friends who watch all their regular TV shows but they don’t even have a TV! They watch everything they want to watch online. Or, if you have a TV but no cable, then you can buy a Computer-to-Television cable so you can watch on your TV what is playing on your computer. (Note: discount computer-to-TV cables are available at BetterCables.com!)

Helpful Products
Wraparound Sunglasses, Comfortable Walking Shoes, Lightweight and Easy Packing Clothes, Luggage: wheeled luggage a must! (Guard your backs, necks and knees!), Vitamins and Supplements, RXs and sunscreen; and always take a bathing suit! Rubber-soled sandals for the shower and the beach, Family photo in a lightweight frame, a few travel-worthy snacks: unsalted nuts (travel usually makes us swell, so no salt!), crackers, dried fruit…

…the things that you would need if:

1. you get stuck in an airport and you have to stay near the gate for an extended time
2. you get an upset stomach and need to calm it down
3. your travel plans get “readjusted” and you have to “stave off starvation”
4. you feel like staying in your stateroom while you get your “sea legs”
5. or you want to go “adventuring” and need some trail mix!

Be sure to read my Travel Guide

...you may also be interested in:

• Travel Guide
• Are cruises good for a family trip?
• Vacations: The New Options

Di Patterson:
I’ve been waiting for someone to ask this question. I have so many ideas but here are just a few:

1. ElderHostel.org, for life-long learning and adventure
2. House Trading, as featured in the movie The Holiday which shows how a couple used HomeExchange.com to trade houses and rekindle their relationship (its a cute picture!)
3. CouchSurfing.com — Come on… you’ve gotta love the name!
   

Helpful Products
Wraparound Sunglasses, Comfortable Walking Shoes, Lightweight and Easy Packing Clothes, Luggage: wheeled luggage a must! (Guard your backs, necks and knees!), Vitamins and Supplements, RXs and sunscreen; and always take a bathing suit! Rubber-soled sandals for the shower and the beach, Family photo in a lightweight frame, a few travel-worthy snacks: unsalted nuts (travel usually makes us swell, so no salt!), crackers, dried fruit…

…and the things that you would need if:

1. you get stuck in an airport and you have to stay near the gate for an extended time
2. you get an upset stomach and need to calm it down
3. your travel plans get “readjusted” and you have to “stave off starvation”
4. you feel like staying in your stateroom while you get your “sea legs”
5. or you want to go “adventuring” and need some trail mix!

Be sure to read my Travel Guide

...you may also be interested in:

• Travel Guide
• Any suggestions for a mini vacation?
• Do you have golf-vacation suggestions?